AI: Shut up and listen
One thing that I’ve been frustrated with over the last week or so is the constant need to explain and re-explain and tackle and re-tackle all the same arguments and strawmen that I’ve been explaining and tackling always.
Men insist they want to help, and I believe that they do… but where do you start with a problem that’s been a problem your whole life that you have to unpack in an elevator pitch to someone who’s been a part of your same society for just as long, if not longer than you?
Then, in the middle of demanding respect, we get told that if we want to be treated equally, we need to ask for it nicer. Don’t say anything that might upset the man you’re talking to, no matter how upset you are, or your application will be denied. Don’t ask that men change their behavior, even if that behavior is a problem. Instead, change yours to make your needs more clear to men. Compromise, see? Explain, and re-explain why that’s not the issue.
If you’re upset about something, you’re asked to please lay it out, logically and in detail, what exactly is upsetting, so it can be analyzed and determined whether your reaction to this specific incident is fair. Explain and re-explain why your reaction is fair.
I feel like we go through this a lot. It’s frustrating. It’s exhausting. Hopefully, in the end, we’ll come out as a better community. But, until then…
What are you tired of explaining? What are you tired of justifying? What do you want people to just get already? What strawmen do you want to just set fire to?
The Afternoon Inquisition (or AI) is a question posed to you, the Skepchick community. Look for it to appear Tuesdays and Thursdays at 3pm ET.