Breaking Astrology News, You Guys! Plus, COTW!
First, I did a new video!
Second, here’s your comment o’ the week:
Remember, nominate your comment o’ the week by replying to the comment (using the little arrow next to the post) and writing “COTW” somewhere in your response!
You actually get three this week because they all made me lol:
James Fox on the new Power Balance arena:
Wow, the Kings now have an arena sponsor as effective as they are.
GabrielBrawley on a Thanksgiving classic:
Turducken. What mad biologist created this thing? How did they even get a Turduck to fuck a chicken? Where do they ranch these monsters?
And a runner-up for skept-artist, who admits he used a generator for this but it’s still funny:
@BayAreaGuy:
Oh great! A gibberish contest! Let me try.
The main theme of the works of Gibson is the role of the writer as reader. Therefore, Bataille uses the term ‘capitalist discourse’ to denote the stasis, and thus the failure, of neostructuralist sexual identity.
“Society is elitist,†says Foucault; however, according to Dietrich[1] , it is not so much society that is elitist, but rather the defining characteristic, and subsequent dialectic, of society. The characteristic theme of Geoffrey’s[2] essay on semantic pretextual theory is a submaterialist whole. It could be said that the collapse of the capitalist paradigm of reality prevalent in Eco’s The Aesthetics of Thomas Aquinas emerges again in Foucault’s Pendulum, although in a more mythopoetical sense.
The primary theme of the works of Eco is not discourse, as Lyotard would have it, but neodiscourse. Scuglia[3] implies that we have to choose between capitalist discourse and Lyotardist narrative. In a sense, Foucault’s model of semantic pretextual theory suggests that the task of the observer is significant form.
As I too changed to virgo, I personally like the Wolverine claw. We can now all go by “Snikts” or maybe “Snikt-Bubs.”
At least your sign is not the Dirty Nose sign, which is sort of the exact opposite of Virgo.
I had an accident last night, and I blame the change in zodiac signs. I was the bull, but now I’m the ram…which is what I did….to a deer.
To me Virgo looks more like “shot glass on a saucer.”
I went from Aquarius to Capricorn. This bites. This bites hard. Aquarius? This was supposed to be my age! Now I’m just a horny old goat.
Man, I slipped backwards from being a cool as a cucumber scorpion to a set of scales. Or… looking at the constellations, from a snake sticking its tongue out to an incomplete trapezoid. Either way I feel decidedly less ROCK! \m/
Welcome to the club. I’m a virgo myself, and it kinda tickles my funny bone because I was named after the virgin Mary (my middle name) and my chinese sign is the snake. So I’m a biblical virgin and a snake. Quite a combo. Especially for an atheist.
As for the new sign names, I’d like to vote for the pony myself. I’ve always had a things for equines.
I, too, apparently am now Virgo.
I decided to rebel. I now consider myself “Orion”.
Apparently most western astrologers practice “tropical” astrology, which preserves the seasonal associations of the star signs, irregardless of the physical position of the stars. So that system is unaffected by our wibbly-wobbly planet. If it weren’t complete nonsense, of course.
I’ve shifted to the virgins too. Yay?
Yes yes. I’m something else too.
Anyway, first comment. Big fan. Listen to SGU all the time…
What I really need to know is, why are you wearing Carl Fredricksen’s glasses?
@malcatrazz: Because that’s what Wolverine Clawians DO.
@simply not edible-
How about a compromise? Oreo. (maybe not,those are ‘somewhat’ edible).
Oh, seemingly I am now a “Leo”:
Generous and warmhearted
Creative and enthusiastic
Broad-minded and expansive
Faithful and loving
On the dark side….
Pompous and patronizing
Bossy and interfering
Dogmatic and intolerant
I think I’ll be both broad minded and expansive AND dogmatic and intolerant at the exact same time!
Great Vid, best yet..
I’m still R-ing O T F L-ing M A Off..
I love that facial expression you ended with. Comedy Gold !!
I just connected my dots in my Leo sign in a new way and came up with, ” man having breakfast beside flooded river “…AND I AM !!… WOW!!! Astrology really works.
@Zyphane:
“irregardless” isn’t a word :P
@Madfishmonger: In college, we had a running gag about ‘irregardless’. It’s my favorite non-word word :)
You should be ‘respective’ of people’s right to use ‘irregardless’ ;)
Wolverine Claw reminded me of some of the Picasso drawings I saw at the Seattle Art Museum today. Lots of anger and strangely phallic.
Thank you Rebecca
@Madfishmonger: I’d care more if English wasn’t a mongrel language that picks through other people’s garbage for loose bits of grammar.
Well that’s just great. I’ve always been the month and year of the ram. Easy to remember. Now I’m the year of the ram, month of the fish. Or was it month of the fish, year of the naked mole rat? Month of the rabid fruit bat, century of the cross-eyed opossum? AArrggg!
Is it fair to make a new COTW nomination on the COTW post? Because if so, @Zyphane has it.
My sign is now the cheese grater.
HUNDREDS of light years?!? Just the Milky Way galaxy is a hundred THOUSAND light years across. Our “local group” is ten MILLION light years across. And beyond that, things get *BIG*. And “beyond that” / BIG is what we’re talking about in astrology.
Here’s a table with the new signs:
http://www.valleycentral.com/news/story.aspx?id=567004
Hey; so that’s why all of astrology’s predictions have been wrong! They didn’t calibrate the instruments (charts)! Now, with the corrected data, we can completely rely on astrology to run our lives!
>;->
Cool, so I’m no longer two diseases, I’m… The Twins?!? Darn. That’s so gay.
Well at least my sister is no longer two dead fish, she’s… Aquarius — a masculine symbol? No; I still think of her as old dead fish. >;->
To heck with it; I’m choosing my own new sign: The Finger. >;->
I was Leo the Lion, now I’m Cancer the Crab. I guess that’s what I get for moving to Baltimore.
@MarlowePI: Damn, same here and I didn’t move anywhere. I prefer Dungeness however.
@JeffGrigg: Almost all visible stars (which form the constellations) are between 20 and 2000 light years away, with most in the range of a few hundred. Despite the revisionist claims astrologers are making about how the stars don’t matter, the background star patterns were the origin of the human personality and behavior patterns ascribed to astrological influences. For example, if the sun was in Taurus when you were born, you were supposed to be bull-like, headstrong and powerful. Astrologers (and astronomers) have known about precession of the equinoxes for literally thousands of years, so the shifting of the signs is nothing new. The shifting of goalposts that the astrologers are currently engaged in might be new, but perhaps not. It would require some historical research to find out, which I don’t think is worth the effort given the inanity of the subject. (Assuming my latent OCD, due to my being an ex-Leo, doesn’t intervene.)
@James Fox: Me three. July 25. Marlowe, great crabs in Baltimore! Crab cakes and beans are a local favorite here in New England.
@Zyphane: Your truthiness is cromulent.
I am going to claim my new sign is Voldemort.
@Madfishmonger: Parseltongue and a gothic fashion sense are the main traits of being an Ophiuchus.
@Buzz Parsec: Aug. 5 here; even had a crab cake burger at the Pike Place Market Cafe’ yesterday. I must have sensed something in the stars!
My new sign is Bullwinkle the Moose.
Fitting with how GD silly horoscopes are.
@Madfishmonger: That sounds much more interesting, I’ma gonna make like you and change mine to “Sauron”… Guess that means perennial eye problems though… D’oh.
You are looking at your new sign upside-down. It’s clearly Pi. Not too bad, really, quite an improvement over an inanimate object. Recently someone asked me my sign, and I told them it was “no right turn”.
So I went through something similar to this a few years ago when I went from being born in the Year of the Tiger (and totally rockin’ that) to the Year of the Ox. (Seriously?) It turns out that the Chinese New Year didn’t occur until February the year I was born, so an Ox I am.
And now, instead of a totally hip, groovy Aquarius (which I never reconciled with my powerfully assertive Tiger identity), I am a stable and serious goat.
Fortunately, as an Ox, I recognize bullshit.
Wow, a COTW that didn’t involve a mention of boobies. I never thought that would happen. I thought I was stuck in the boobie ghetto. Not that I minded being there.
Since we are choosing our signs I choose Picachu! Ha, not really. I choose Vorlon.
@Gabrielbrawley: Really? Cos Vorlons are kind of ass.
@BeardofPants: Yeah, I know that they didn’t work out so well, especially when the Shadow Vorlon war really took off but I still think they kick ass.
@Zyphane: Well I’d agree there, but that is actually true of most languages out there, with the exception of a very small subset of languages and the dead ones, all languages are in essence mongrel tongues which pick up there grammars from other sources.
@Ubi Dubium: “Recently someone asked me my sign, and I told them it was “no right turnâ€.”
COTW
I have always considered myself (and with the shift apparently still am) an Ophiuchus. Particularly because those who genuinely believe in horoscopes never get it.
Before I knew about Ophiuchus, I used to say my sign was “no smoking”, or “Yield”, and I considered “no user servicable parts inside” for a while.
@exarch: “Batteries not included”
Huh, it seems like my sign didn’t change at all. I was Leo, and still Leo.
@IBY, Leos are known to be very resistant to change
@exarch: LOL COTW (nice Ranma avvie, btw)
@Gabrielbrawley Being an ass and kickin arse probably aren’t mutually exclusive. ;)
Fortunately Google was kind enough to offer me an astrology course while I was watching the video- Learn Astrology from the Experts! Good work, Google.
Someone please save me! My co-workers are in the next room reading there Horoscopes!! And discussing this. I have told them that they were not born under the constellations that are correlated with their birthdays now for years they still don’t listen.. It’s like being a adult that still believes Santa Claus gave them gifts as a child. It’s enough to want to leave this wobbly earth!