Every year around this time, people start asking what happened to Halloween. There are a number of complaints about it, these days, including but not limited to:
- Not scary enough
- Too safe
- Too many punk kids not dressing up
- Too many satanists destroying Christianity
- Not enough Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle costumes at the local CVS
And then there’s something I’ve been joking about for quite a while now — the proliferation of the sexy costume. The average woman who wants to purchase a costume has no choice but to procure the “sexy” version of whatever she wants to be. This includes: sexy witch, sexy vampire, sexy cat, sexy bunny, sexy cavewoman, sexy Starbucks girl, sexy bumblebee, sexy prospector, sexy golfer, sexy judge, sexy fast food worker, sexy Statue of Liberty, sexy Minnie Mouse, sexy Rainbrow Bright, sexy Girl Scout, and sexy construction worker. Right now you’re thinking I threw in a few funny ones just to make you laugh. I DIDN’T. They’re all sold right here. To be honest I kind of like Rainbrow Bright.
This recent article in the New York Times asks what is behind this absurdity. Some seem to place a lot of blame on the costume companies, which is just a little ridiculous — they wouldn’t sell the things if people weren’t buying them. If you’ve ever been in a Halloween/costume shop, you’ll know that they don’t really put a ton of effort into marketing the things. It’s usually cheap fabric tossed into a clear plastic bag with an embarassing photo on the front. A lot of women want to dress up like that — so is that a problem?
Maybe, maybe not. Halloween has become a day during which you can be whatever you want, for just one night. Some people go with the traditional scary, some go with funny, and it doesn’t really seem like cause for alarm that some women want to be overtly sexual. It’s fun to dress up like that, and it’s fun to feel sexy. When else do you get a chance to look like a slutty Girl Scout? I mean, besides that year you hit puberty and noticed boys before the other girls in your troop?
One person quoted in the article points to a double standard, in that men’s costumes tend to be crass, not sexy. Is that really a double standard, or do most men just not care about being sexy on Halloween? Most guys I know enjoy a good chainsaw massacre over the latest Sandra Bullock movie, so is it really that big of a surprise that they’d rather slather themselves in blood rather than walk around in a g-string?
That’s when it comes to adults, of course. How about the kids? Surely the trend of sexxxing up Halloween is only relevant to the 16+ crowd?
Excuse me, I have to go ponder my new-found hatred of humanity.