Skepticism

Doctor Woo

I don’t usually share my dreams, although I have vivid ones nightly. Dream interpretatation is pointless – the ‘see the future’ side is nonsense and the ‘insight into your subconcious’ part is…well, I don’t know if it’s meaningful but my dreams tend to be a jumble of things I’ve done and seen that day, mixed in with all the arts I’ve ever been exposed to. I feel compelled to share this one because it involves everyone. Yesterday I watched an episode of Doctor Who, and caught up on some Skepchick posts (I did other things too, like work, but that’s boring), then last night I dreamed…

that a super-intelligent race of hot women were taking over the planet by emitting hypnotising gas from their vaginas. Except in my dream, they referred to them as their vajayjays.

Sigh.

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30 Comments

  1. The BBC explained this in a press release from this morning.
    “The BBC would like to apologize for the error in our subliminal mind control programming during a recent airing of Doctor Who. The interspersed frames were supposed to be of a naked David Tennant but, were, unfortunately, replaced by subliminal frames from an upcoming episode of Oprah on queefing.
    Those responsible for the mixup have been sacked.”

  2. a super-intelligent race of hot women were taking over the planet by emitting hypnotising gas from their vaginas. Except in my dream, they referred to them as their vajayjays.

    Or as I call it: Thursdays.

  3. TEEK!

    a super-intelligent race of hot women were taking over the planet by emitting hypnotising gas from their vaginas. Except in my dream, they referred to them as their vajayjays.

    Have you pitched this yet? This has “Roland Emmerich Movie” written all over it.

    (Make the gas explosive rather than hypnotic, and Michael Bay will kick down your front door to find you. Put all the vajayjays underwater? Hel-LO James Cameron.)

    Can I be the casting supervisor? I’ll work pro bono.

  4. At first I laughed hard, it was such a bodacious dream, then laughed even harder at some of the comments, and then fell into a dark funk, realizing that if hypnotic gas producing vaginas were a reality, probably the West would embrace infibulation.

  5. An electrical engineer friend of mine watched too many episodes of House before bed and dreamt that he was performing differential diagnoses on batteries: one had paraneoplastic syndrome, another was pregnant. . . .

    Not long after that, I dreamt that I met Robert Sean Leonard (who plays Dr. Wilson) at a “communicating science in the media” conference. We were trying to make our way to the buffet table in the banquet hall, and I was going to ask him, “So, that kid in Dead Poets Society — were we supposed to think that he was gay and couldn’t come out to his parents, or did he just really want to be an actor?” But I woke up before I could pose the question.

    Maybe dwelling on a dream can cause dreams on the same subject to recur. A few nights later. . . There was a marina on the Charles River, just by the Cambridgeside Galleria mall (which itself had turned into something more resembling Lyon’s Rue de la République). Gregory House lived on a boat in the marina. He, Neil DeGrasse Tyson and I were studying a virtual-reality map of ocean currents and bisphenol A concentrations. When the computer predicted that Boston would soon be flooded with toxic seawaters, Tyson joked, “Looks like it’s time to move your houseboat inland.”

    “Or. . .” said House.

    Cut to the House-boat suspended from a dirigible painted with racing flames, floating serenely above the city. “Bitchin!”

  6. I’m imagining the classic metallic silver V neck top and mini skirt, with hip high boots and beehive hairdoos. If I weren’t busy at work I’d illustrate that.

    This sounds like a job for Captain Kirk!

  7. @neverclear5: I think those with the predisposition toward hypno-vajayjays have a clear breeding advantage. Any woman who can turn a one-night stand into a long-term partnership through mind-control has more opportunities to pass on both the genes for magic vaginas, but the genes on the male side to be more susceptible to vaginal suggestion.

    Peer-reviewed research to follow.

  8. a super-intelligent race of hot women were taking over the planet by emitting hypnotising gas from their vaginas. Except in my dream, they referred to them as their vajayjays.

    This post appeared right after the one titled “Are you ready for the Skepchick Invasion?”

    BTW, is there a list somewhere of the allowed HTML-like tags for comments? I need the one that people use for quoting, that indents the text with a vertical line.

  9. I for one welcome our new’ super-intelligent race of hot women emitting hypnotising gas from their vaginas’ overlords.

    It’s funny that what could be viewed as a nightmare to some can be seen as a little slice of heaven to others.

  10. @No Comfort in Lies:

    I think those with the predisposition toward hypno-vajayjays have a clear breeding advantage. Any woman who can turn a one-night stand into a long-term partnership through mind-control has more opportunities to pass on both the genes for magic vaginas, but the genes on the male side to be more susceptible to vaginal suggestion.

    I think this has already happened.

  11. I am confused what the gas is for. Gay men? Straight women?

    @ PeteSchult : Take hot to mean what you will. I certainly don’t take it to mean that they’re tanned to the point where I might try to put them in a fruit basket over an orange.

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