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Transcript:
Every year since 2021, and at times twice a year, I’ve debated the timing of my COVID vaccine and/or booster. I lead a delightfully low-risk lifestyle, in that I work from home, I don’t usually eat or drink inside public places, and I wear a mask when I’m at place like the grocery store. So I would time my vaccinations to happen two or three weeks before I wanted to do something higher risk, like travel or throw myself a birthday party.
This year, the metric for figuring out the right timing includes an additional data point: is the brain worm controlling the racist nepo baby going to take vaccines away entirely at some point? And because that’s a thing I’m thinking about right now, I assume some of you may be thinking about it, too, especially if you are here in the United States like I am, so I wanted to make this little video for you.
I’ll give you the tl;dw right here at the top: go get your flu and COVID vaccinations right now. Today, if you can.
Are vaccines going away? Hopefully not! But it is a possibility, as is the possibility that they might get harder to find or to afford.
Let’s dive in. I’m not going to spend a lot of time going over the data that irrefutably proves that the COVID vaccine, much like the flu vaccine, is a safe and effective way to protect yourself and those around you from days or weeks of mucus-filled, lung-destroying agony, hospitalization, or death. I won’t bother because it’s 2025. If you know, you know. If you don’t, you’re part of the handful of losers who comment on every video I publish asking me if I’ve died yet from all the vaccines I got. I have not. I also haven’t gotten COVID according to all tests available, and I don’t really get sick at all, ever. It’s pretty great. But I know that you will simply go on believing that the vaccines are deadly and that this is actually a deepfake video produced by Big Pharma to hide the fact that Rebecca died suddenly three years ago. We keep all the videos criticizing Big Pharma on the channel just so you don’t suspect anything’s up.
Okay, now onto the normal people. Hi. Currently, the most recent formulation of the mRNA COVID vaccine is available, which is great! The Food and Drug Adminstration approved them last month, but not for everyone, despite them being safe and effective for most people. RFK, Jr.’s anti-vaccine directive resulted in the approval only applying to “high risk” individuals, which is people over the age of 65 and those with any one of a long list of conditions, from depression to obesity to having smoked at any point in your life up until now.
So, just show up to a pharmacy, do a semi-convincing smoker’s cough, and boom, you’re vaccinated, right? Well, no. It’s more complicated than that.
CVS, the largest pharmacy chain in the US, immediately started offering vaccines to anyone who wanted one in 41 states, because those states do not have laws that restrict the ability of pharmacies to offer vaccinations without a prescription. So, if you’re in one of the other states, you have to have a doctor willing to write you a prescription, right? Well, no, it’s more complicated than that.
Many state governments have introduced legislation to open up access to the vaccines in a number of ways. For instance, in some places pharmacists themselves can write the prescription and then give the vaccine, or there’s a telehealth monitor at the pharmacy that allows a doctor to write the prescription remotely. Maine, one of the states that had laws that DID restrict vaccinations to requiring a prescription, issued a standing order overriding that. And California, Hawaii, Oregon and Washington have joined together in an alliance to provide their own guidance on vaccines.
So, if you’re in one of those states, just show up and get your vaccine, right? Nope, still more complicated. Like, no one knows what’s happening in Oregon as of this writing. Oregon! Get your shit together! But everyone everywhere seems to be running into roadblocks and exceptions, which is by design: the Republicans want you to get COVID and die, and they’ll do it in any way they can including bureaucratic incompetence.
Oh, and none of this actually includes whether or not insurance is going to cover some or all of the cost of the vaccine, so even if you CAN get one without a prescription, your insurance might decided that they won’t cover it. We really do have the best healthcare system in the world, don’t we? Not to beat a horse that dies from an uncontrolled horsepox epidemic, but we’re talking about a disease that can only be stopped by getting as many people vaccinated as possible. Why would we want to make that easier?
To make matters worse, at the end of this week, the CDC’s Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices will meet to debate whether or not you should get a COVID vaccine. The previous approval came from the FDA and is where CVS is getting its marching orders. This panel’s decision will affect what insurers will cover, what kids can get for free, and it also usually would affect state and local laws surrounding vaccine availability. And good news, RFK has stacked this year’s panel with a bunch of COVID and vaccine deniers. And a podcaster. So, if you are in a red state where you currently have access to the vaccine, there’s a chance that whatever batshit nonsense comes out of that panel might mean you’ll have to visit some other, better run state if you’d like to get through the season without catching a virus that will knock you on your ass, kill a few more neurons, and, you know, kill you if you’re immunocompromised or very unlucky.
And yeah, despite the fact that our federal government is no longer actively monitoring or even acknowledging COVID, wastewater reports show that some states are currently at or near the peak of their summer spike, and history tells us there will probably be a winter spike in a few months, too.
So! I know that it’s all very confusing, but please don’t just get overwhelmed and give up. Your best course of action is to just ask around at your local pharmacies and see if they’re offering vaccines, if you need a prescription, and if your insurance will cover it. If they ask if you have any risk factors for dying of COVID, say yes. Reports from friends in other states is that there have been no follow up questions after that and no requests for proof. Just “do any of these factors increase your risk? Yes? Okay, here’s your vaccination, have a great day.”
I know that some people are waiting to get Novavax, the more traditional/non-mRNA COVID vaccine, because they experience more negative side effects with mRNA. Novavax got the same FDA approval as the mRNA vaccines and it works as well, but it may be more difficult to find. I’ve had all the vaccines and react the same way to all of them, so I can’t tell you that you should suck it up and get whatever’s available. I’m optimistic that the vaccines will be available all season long–I’m just pretty sure that things are going to get more confusing and uncertain, and I personally thrive when I have a plan in place and can see it through. That’s why I was vaccinated literally today, for both flu and COVID. It’s done and I don’t have to think about it until next year, at which point, well, I’ll probably have died in the horsepoxalypse so I won’t have to think about it next year, either. Always look on the bright side of life, I say!
