This is the inevitable, hilarious result the anti-vaccination brigade deserves: an article in The Daily Fail about a batty organization called Canine Health Concern that says vaccinated dogs are getting autism just like Jenny McCarthy says happens to the widdle people babies.
The best part is that the organization’s Grand High Contessa of Dumbassness Catherine O’Driscoll gave the Fail some beautiful quotes, all of which appear to be lifted directly from the kooks at Age of Autism but cleverly reworded to change “bebbies” to “puppehs”:
We are not anti-vaccination. What we are saying is that currently our
kidspets are receiving far too many.
The latest scientific research shows that after the first course of injections as a
babypuppy most peopledogs are immune against these diseases for at least seven years, if not for life.
big Pharmapet vaccination companies hold National Vaccination Month, a national campaign when parentspet owners whose boosters have lapsed by 18 months or more are terrified into having their babypet jabbed.
While the vast majority of
doctorsvets might simply not be aware of the latest scientific research, we are concerned that for a few undoubtedly doing multiple jabs is a way of making more money from worried parentspet owners.
They are not anti-vaccination, people! They’re just pro-fewer-vaccinations! For dogs! Dogs who get autism! Because they don’t come when called! Like Charlie, the autistic spaniel who “even bit Mrs Davis on the face and her husband Chris on the hand!” Because he was autistic! Not because they were dumbasses and he desperately wanted to be given away to a shelter that might find him a home with sensible people who are not dumbasses.
O’Driscoll also worries that rabbits and cats are at risk. Can you imagine a cat with autism? My god, it would stare off into space, be frightened by innocuous plastic bags, bite you with no provocation, and not come when called by name. HOLY SHIT PEOPLE! Don’t even get me started on the poor autistic bunnies, obsessively counting poop pellets and watching People’s Court.
It’s tough to laugh at parents who are worried about vaccines giving their kids autism. It’s an understandable worry if you’re ignorant of the science. But this? Please mock this. There is nothing about this article that is not mockable. In fact, this article is so mockable that I believe that it was written by a skeptic hoping to show the anti-vaxx propaganda for the idiocy that it is.
And for the record, no. The scientific evidence does not back any of that crazy bat’s accusations.