Wondering what went on inside the creationist amusement park Dinosaur Adventure Land? For those of you who didn’t get a chance to visit Kent Hovind’s pseudoscientific fantasy world before the big nasty government shut it down for lack of building permits, check out this home movie showing some of the “rides.” Footage was shot a few days after the place was closed, so sadly we can’t witness kids actually playing the “Nerve Wracking Ball” game, in which they hold very still and pray while the Lord’s Holy Pendulum rushes at their faces. Another highlight is the Grand Canyon display, in which it is proven that Jesus made the Grand Canyon because of the following unimpeachable trail of logic:
1.) The top of the Canyon is very high, and the bottom is very low.
2.) The Colorado River is at the bottom.
3.) Water does not run uphill.
It’s all so clear now! I’m sure that once the government sees this information, they’ll admit that Hovind was a genius and release him from his 10-year jail sentence for tax evasion (which may be reduced to five years if his lawyers get their way).