Anti-Science

Anti-abortion Congressman Not Sure How Women Work

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Sorta transcript:

Vito Barbieri is an anti-choice Republican state representative for Idaho, giving him an intellectual capacity that hovers somewhere between a cocker spaniel and a tree stump. So it shouldn’t be surprising that he made headlines this week for thinking that the average woman can swallow a camera and have it end up somewhere in her vagina.

No, this information wasn’t made public because of a weird sex scandal, although I think we can all agree that a senator asking a female constituent to swallow a camera while he masturbates wouldn’t be the weirdest sex scandal we’ve had in the US in the past decade.

No, it came up because in Idaho they’re debating whether or not to prohibit doctors from prescribing safe and effective healthcare for women in the form of medical abortions via phone or conferencing apps like Skype. Note that this isn’t actually done in Idaho. They want to outlaw it just in case.

Barbieri asked a doctor whether or not a woman could swallow a camera so that a doctor could see “what the situation is” in regards to her possible pregnancy. Note that this method would also be useful for differentiating between women who are pregnant and women who accidentally ate watermelon seeds and had watermelons growing inside of them.

When the doctor told Barbieri that swallowed objects do not end up in the vagina, Barbieri replied, “Fascinating. That makes sense,” probably wondering if his wife would agree just one time to have sex without using the sheet with the hole in it, so that he might finally gaze upon the mysterious wonder that is the female reproductive system.

Barbieri sits on the board of the Open Arms Pregnancy Care Center and Real Choices Clinic, so it may seem odd that he doesn’t know how women’s bodies work until you realize the only “Real Choices” the clinic provides are whether to give birth to a baby and then put it into the foster care system or else give birth to a baby and then be responsible for it for the next 18 years.

Here’s the real kicker, though: Barbieri’s dumbshit question conceals the fact that a doctor doesn’t need a visual of a patient’s uterus in order to prescribe a medical abortion. Why? Because in cases like this, which I have to say again don’t currently happen in Idaho, the patient has to have an in-person exam at a clinic, complete with a competent professional who is trained to identify potential problems for the doctor. Either Barbieri is also too stupid to realize that OR he’s purposely concealing the fact in order to push his anti-woman agenda.

This all really drives home the fact that America is the Land of Opportunity, because a man that stupid and hateful can get married, grow to the age of 63, and even have children who I assume are either adopted or who were birthed while Barbieri’s wife was concealed inside a shame hut.

Rebecca Watson

Rebecca leads a team of skeptical female activists at Skepchick.org. She travels around the world delivering entertaining talks on science, atheism, feminism, and skepticism. There is currently an asteroid orbiting the sun with her name on it. You can follow her every fascinating move on Twitter or on Google+.

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