Religion

Tim Heidecker’s Ode to Scientology

Tim Heidecker, the “Tim” half of “Tim and Eric,” is well known as a bizarro, Kaufman-esque cringey comedian. But he also creates music, which in true Tim Heidecer form isn’t really obviously comedic but usually has some subtle element of weirdness behind an earnest facade. For instance, when he heard Bob Dylan was releasing a 14-minute long song about the Titanic, Heidecker created one that was 15 minutes long and released it first.

Anyway, his most recent offering is a song about Scientology inspired by The Kinks. Lyrics below.

Scientology
That’s the plan for me
I’m getting my whole family involved
Use it responsibly
Only in times of need
And maybe one day we’ll meet Tom

Walked into the celebrity center
Came out feeling much better, yes I did

Scientology
That’s the plan for me
I’m getting my whole family involved

Gonna get my copy of Dianetics signed

Gonna get my copy of Dianetics signed

Gonna get my copy of Dianetics signed

Gonna get my copy of Dianetics signed

Yes I will, oh yeah

Scientology
That’s the plan for me
I’m getting my whole family involved, yeah the wife and kids
Use it responsibly
Only in times of need
And maybe one day we’ll meet Tom

Well they fitted me for a uniform
Said I’m gonna be working for the Sea Org

Scientology
That’s the plan for me
I’m giving all my money to ’em, take it all
I haven’t seen my wife
They say she belongs with someone else, said I’m not good enough
oh well
I guess I’ll go hand out a few books
I’ll hand out a few of these books
Free books!
Free books!

Rebecca Watson

Rebecca leads a team of skeptical female activists at Skepchick.org. She travels around the world delivering entertaining talks on science, atheism, feminism, and skepticism. There is currently an asteroid orbiting the sun with her name on it. You can follow her every fascinating move on Twitter or on Google+.

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2 Comments

  1. The picture in that video is the hospital where I was born. It’s located in the heart of Hollywood on Fountain Ave. The story: In 1960 (egad, it’s been a long time!) that building was Cedars of Lebanon Hospital. When Cedars of Lebanon merged with Mount Sinai and formed Cedars-Sinai, they built this really nice hospital in Beverly Hills and moved there. They sold the building and it eventually fell into the hands of the Church or Scientology. So when people ask me where I was born, I tell them it was in the Church of Scientology.

  2. As with the Heaven’s Gate cult, what is quite striking is how dated their iconography is. Hubbard adopted what passed for ‘futuristic’ in the 1950s which is a look we now associate with the 1950s and not modern at all. The Heaven’s Gate aliens were the most stereotypical 1960s bug eyed aliens.

    Order of the Solar Temple had a medieval aesthetic which didn’t need to be updated. Though the use of a hidden electric light to make the sword glow… 1940s stage magic at best.

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