Quickies

Skepchick Quickies, 12.19

Jen

Jen is a writer and web designer/developer in Columbus, Ohio. She spends too much time on Twitter at @antiheroine.

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12 Comments

  1. I like the woman nerds article. I think supporting such groups will help but still struggle (right now) with one issue, woman on woman hate/competition. Many women in the geek/nerd culture that I’ve come across have learned to compete with other women in order to win male praise (and perceived acceptance). Although I’m sure many people are naturally competitive (believe me I go above and beyond) it seems like women who have been “the only chick” at so many gaming tables have to prove themselves highlander style.

    I’m dealing with this problem right now as I try to make friends and integrate at a new workplace. It is such a turn off when it is obviously directly solely at me because I’m another woman and not just general competitiveness. It is more likely to make me want to leave and just go hang out with the guys because the misogyny I’m used to is better than misogyny AND additional insults from what should be female comrades.

    The worst part is often called these people out would serve to destroy the relationship because it introduces the concept of woman on woman hate into a group that is meant to be friendly, and therefore really has difficulty discussing issues with its own biases.

  2. I’ve been playing D&D with some friends. The Dungeon Master’s wife was playing:

    “DM:…and you die!
    wife: But you can’t do that, it’s not fair!
    DM: Yes i can, i’m the Dungeon Master!
    wife: And i’m your WIFE!!!
    DM: …ok…”

  3. The thing that really leaped out when I first read that article about the rapist who moved next door to his victim, was this quote, “If I can get over it, why can’t she? It’s past tense.”

    Sort of sums it up in a nutshell, really. :/

    1. Well, that’s the thing. According to justice, he served his time, so he is now innocent. What would be the solution here? If he was a robber and moved next door to a home he robbed, would it be as bad? From the justice’s system point of view, there wouldn’t be any difference.

      1. What the buggering fuckity fuck? Time served != innocence. And in actual fact, the time served goes on your record as a black mark. In any case, if you read the article, he has a high likelihood of recidivism, and had been actively sending the victim letters from jail. This is not the work of an innocent individual. This is the work of a predator enjoying playing with his prey.

    2. Well, I realize it’s a NZ story, but here in the U.S. if you commit a felony, and especially a sex crime, you never go back to the status you had prior to conviction. The government continues to have some control over you specifically to prevent this sort of thing. In most states, I suspect this victim could get a court order requiring him to move and keep his distance.

      That is an extremely unnerving case. If I were her, I think I would move, and that she should feel so pressured to is very unfair.

      1. To suggest she should move is no answer. If it’s even a real option her, she should not in any have to change her life because of him. She can’t reclaim control of her life if she has to keep making changes to accomodate him.

        I know the suggestion hasn’t gone over well before, but there comes a time when I’d think about having a serious talk with him. And if it takes dropping him in a hole in the woods, so be it.

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