Quickies

Skepchick Quickies, 8.25

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Jen

Jen is a writer and web designer/developer in Columbus, Ohio. She spends too much time on Twitter at @antiheroine.

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16 Comments

  1. Hi there!

    I’d be curious to know the motivations behind the women and men who took the “look at pornography” test. Does it reveal that maybe men aren’t the shameless pigs that we thought they were? Are women actually more lurid than previously believed?

    Or, have men just become experts at proper oogling behavior?

    “Whoa! Naked woman! Okay dude, look at her face first. Face FIRST! You don’t want to blow this. Now carefully, carefulllly look down. Just a quick glance, make sure nobody noticed. Wow. Okay, hmm. Her expression hasn’t changed … Awesome, now, quickly look down. Now LOOK LOWER! Oooh Baby. Nice. What? There are more of these? Woo! Next picture!!”.

    Has that become so hard-wired into men that we instinctively revert to oogling behavior even when we consciously know and understand that it’s only a picture? I think so! :D

    — Craig

  2. @Draconius: Hah. I met my friend’s (male) roommate yesterday, and he did a very obvious “boob glance” — most guys at least try to hide the glance, but not this guy! Of course, I was wearing a shirt that didn’t give me cleavage, but it did make my boobs go, “HI! I am here! ENJOY!” so I can’t really blame him, lol.

  3. @Draconius: @marilove: LOL! One thing that always annoyed me to a degree was when people complain about men staring at boobs. I am not speaking for any other woman when I say this but I identify as straight and *I* can’t NOT look at boobs when they are out there either.

    If there is cleavage or just obvious boobage I am going to look too (or the same thing a straight guy would do too, look briefly but don’t linger :-P)

  4. @Stevie: Well, there is a difference between a quick glance, and staring. Staring ain’t cool. A quick glance every now and again is no big deal. But seriously, I have a face. I am not all boobs.

    If he had continued to stare at my boobs while we talked, I would have gotten a bit uncomfortable and pissed. But he didn’t. He glanced quickly and that was that (a little obviously, but like I said … my boobs looked glorious).

    At a previous job, there was this skeeevy old man that would TALK to a woman’s tits. EVERY woman. He was especially fond of doing this in the elevator. Every.single.woman at that place knew who he was just by saying, “The creepy boob guy.” It was creepy. And annoying.

    As a queer girl, however, I agree: I cannot help but are at a nice rack. But that isn’t necessarily super-cleavage. Also, if you have a nice rear, I will look. I am amazing at sneaking glances, though. YOU WILL NEVER EVEN KNOW. :D I am worse then men, I wear.

  5. ALSO, as a woman with rather large breasts, I can get why some women get annoyed that men tend to look at their breasts a lot. Because I can’t hide mine, even if I wear a turtleneck. So they are always there. Obviously there. I don’t mind the glances, but I can see why some women would — it does get annoying to always be BOOBS and not much else. I have a rather um … large personality, along with my large tits, so that doesn’t tend to happen to me (I won’t let it), but for other women it can get kind of annoying to never be looked at in the face. Having dealt with plenty of creepers, I totally get the feeling of not wanting to just be BOOBS.

    Also, yeah, yeah, I like the word tits. It just fits in certain contexts. TITS!

  6. @marilove: Oh yes, definitely. Totally a difference between staring and glancing. I just meant the passive little I-can’t-help-it-glancing.

    But then again, boobs or no boobs I hate it when people don’t look at me when they talk. There is someone I know that looks at my lips everytime I talk rather then my eyes and this drives me insane.

    Also, when people stare at the floor when they are talking to you. It makes me feel like I have talking to a wall.

  7. @marilove:

    Because I can’t hide mine, even if I wear a turtleneck.

    Then it’s a burka for you, young lady!

    Seriously, a friend of mine, who had size J boobs before she got them reduced, went back to work after the surgery, where a male coworker said ‘Wow, T! You have a pretty face!’ He then turned brick red, as he realised what he was admitting.

  8. Hi there!

    @Mrmisconception @Marilove @Stevie @ DominEditrix:

    I was at a library conference where two women that I’d just met were complaining about the number of men at the conference who has been staring at their chests. I guess I must have blushed or something, because they immediately said: “Oh no, not YOU! We wouldn’t have mentioned it if YOU were one of those guys”. They went on to say that there were, in fact, men at the conference who had been speaking directly into their boobs as if that was where the microphone was hidden.

    This was a huge relief to me for all of 5 seconds until I realized that now I was terrified of even GLANCING below eye level. A wild tamarin in an Elvis costume could have run in and started gnawing on her leg, and I would. not. have. looked. down.

    Which was just as well, because her eyes were gorgeous. :D

  9. I think it’s less reflex ogling and more that beauty/hawt/attractiveness isn’t based on individual factors but the proportions and symmetry.

    Men also came up with the term “Butterface”. This might be a reflection of that.

  10. @Stevie:

    I think people simply cant help but look. I remember a demonstration of an eye tracking device at my university a few years back. The lecturer asked a young women to come forward in front of a packed hall and to look through the device at the main screen. He would then change the picture to a half naked man, and you could see her eye movement on screen with a 3 second lag I think. They would always start looking at the face and then naturally move down, even in front of the hundreds of people where the pressure not to do it would presumably be quite high.
    I would assume that we are simply programmed to look at “interesting” things. Faces apparently being the most interesting though.

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