I just tweeted “If I was Harry Potter I’d just do a spell instead of washing. EXSMELLYARMPITS!” which is funny because it’s a pun on a Potter-world spell, you see. Honestly, it’s funny. Anyway, it made me think of one of my favourite tweets by my bro-in-law @stubarb1 posted a few weeks ago:
I’m not trying to point the finger of blame at Hogwarts but what the fuck were the wizards doing 1939 through to 1945?
He makes an excellent point. So while I was amusing myself thinking of this, I decided to search ‘harry potter’ on Twitter to see what other people were saying about it. Turns out there’s a Potter movie marathon on TV in the USA, so there are lots of tweets. Y’know…I’m not saying that I’m superior or anything, but I did get a giggle from these that I’m sure the authors didn’t intend. From someone called tresleybossdon:
Watchin harry potter…im ashamed ã‚¨ feel like a lame
Dude…don’t watch it then. Or, watch it, feel ashamed, but don’t tweet about it. That way Harry Potter can be your secret shame. Like wanking when you think about pantyhose.
From haiderabbasi, a pearl of wisdom:
Harry Potter movies are misleading and bisexual. Books FTW!
Yes, books for the win! Like dictionaries! For defining words like ‘misleading’ and ‘bisexual’!
I am seriously hoping the extra letter in this confession from anythingzombie is a typo:
And that’s all I have to say. Twitter status: Watching Harry Potter ’cause he’s one of my first lovers.
As for this tweet by Haleighhh…
Chinese food and Harry Potter movie marathon? Oh yeaah :)
…I don’t think I saw that one. Was it the movie before Harry Potter and the Cheesy Pizza? My mistake, it’s the one after this one that weeblesue is watching:
settling in for a long night of Harry Potter and filing.
JK Rowling really ran out of plot ideas after a while. Fortunately, she can get advice from literary master mariahlamboy:
harry potter is so eww mad weird lol
I took a while deciding who to give the last word to, but I think it has to be this gem from ANNZac because the only bit I understood was ‘jizz’:
Worst job in the world: jizz mopper at ‘The Wizarding World of Harry Potter’
Big thanks to all the authors of these tweets, if you come across this post and want yours removed, just give me a yell :)