Onions and Swine Flu
One of my dear friends is a hair stylist and one thing she has taught me is that those ladies at the salon love to talk. I have been kept on top of many a rumor thanks to my lovely, hair-chopping friend and the latest story is one that I thought I should share.
Apparently, there is really NO need to get the scary flu shot and you don’t even need to “boost” (whatever the heck that means) your immune system because all you really need my friends, is just a few onions laying around.
Thats right! The latest H1N1 fake-cure is an old wives tale dredged up for your entertainment. The not-so-new story being regurgitated and circulated by email and apparently by hair salon customers, goes like this:
In 1919 when the flu killed 40 million people there was this Doctor that visited the many farmers to see if he could help them combat the flu. Many of the farmers and their family had contracted it and many died.
The doctor came upon this one farmer and to his surprise, everyone was very healthy. When the doctor asked what the farmer was doing that was different the wife replied that she had placed an unpeeled onion in a dish in the rooms of the home, (probably only two rooms back then). The doctor couldn’t believe it and asked if he could have one of the onions and placed it under the microscope. She gave him one and when he did this, he did find the flu virus in the onion. It obviously absorbed the virus, therefore, keeping the family healthy.
Now, I heard this story from my hairdresser in AZ. She said that several years ago many of her employees were coming down with the flu and so were many of her customers. The next year she placed several bowls with onions around in her shop. To her surprise, none of her staff got sick. It must work.. (And no, she is not in the onion business.)
The moral of the story is, buy some onions and place them in bowls around your home. If you work at a desk, place one or two in your office or under your desk or even on top somewhere. Try it and see what happens. We did it last year and we never got the flu.
If this helps you and your loved ones from getting sick, all the better. If you do get the flu, it just might be a mild case..
Whatever, what have you to lose? Just a few bucks on onions
Yes, I thought it was cute that the legend has a hairdresser in it and that hairdressers and salon visitors are spreading the rumor still. It reminds me of Airborn’s “created by a school teacher” nonsense. Forget what all the doctors and scientists say because I heard of a really stinky hair salon where they placed onions all over and no one got the flu! So just do that!
This is just a theory but maybe no one got the flu because no one wanted to go to the salon that smelled like rotten onions? Not to mention the fact that all the hair stylists were most likely crying all day from being forced by their crazy boss to cut onions during their shift. Just a theory.
The rest of the story is nothing but anecdote. I have assless chaps that I wore last year and I NEVER got the flu. You should totally wear assless chaps too. What do you have to loose? Just a few bucks spent on assless chaps?
Here are some pesky facts. The flu is a virus which is spread by contact. You get sneezed or coughed on by someone who is infected or you touch a surface that has been touched by someone who has left a droplet of the virus, you pick up the virus and then touch your eyes, nose or mouth and bam, you have the virus. The flu is not going to float around until it is touched by an onion-magneto-field. Onions are not going to suck the virus out of someone walking by. Onions will not not protect you with a spicy forcefield. Onions will not boost your immune system because that is not plausible (unless you are a pirate and you have scurvy, then maybe enough raw onions will help you). You can eat them, slice them, hang them from the ceiling, feng shui them, sautÃ© them, fry them, blend them in a smoothy or my particular favorite, french onion soupify them and they still won’t protect you from the flu. They will protect you from hunger if prepared deliciously. One other fact is this: Every time a pseudoscientific claim or baseless rumor is spread about the flu virus more people turn away from legitimate care, which means more people’s lives are put at risk. There is no magic cure for what ails us, but there is science and evidence based medicine and that is the best method for understanding disease and the best defense against illness we have.
So stop making silly excuses and more importantly, stop being a sissy and go get your flu shots!