Skepchick Quickies 10.9



Amanda is a science grad student in Boston whose favorite pastimes are having friendly debates and running amok.

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  1. October 9, 2008 at 9:33 am —

    Your comment on the Christian reality dating show is simultaneously the funniest and saddest thing I have read this week.

    Re: Monkey Waiters. I clicked on the link thinking that the story couldn’t possibly live up to the title. I was wrong. Look at that little guy go. Also, the pedant in me is heartened to see that they are, in fact, monkeys and not apes.

  2. October 9, 2008 at 9:44 am —

    Re: Monkey waiters –


    Wow. Just…wow. All I’m saying is: crows may be smart, but you don’t see them waiting tables.

    Re: Geek library –

    I’m not nerdy enough to really get a lot of what he’s got in there, but I definitely appreciate the hell out of it. Damned cool. Yet one more thing to be jealous about when I go home to my shoddy apartment :-P

  3. October 9, 2008 at 9:53 am —

    Augh! Monkeys are taking jobs away from us! You know someone somewhere is reading this and wondering if they can teach monkeys to work a Frialator.

    I guess I’m safe for now. I haven’t seen any stories about monkeys writing Java code. Y’know, you could do a scale of how complex a job is based on how many monkeys it takes to do it. Waiter = 1 monkey, Shakespeare = infinite number of monkeys. I figure my job’s somewhere in between.

  4. October 9, 2008 at 10:10 am —

    The Christian Reality Show link has to be the saddest and most depressing thing I’ve read in a while. Atlanta-area Christian ladies: run away! Run far, far away.

    I didn’t think it was possible, but the show sounds even worse than “Chains of Love”. It makes me ashamed to be human.

    I wonder if I can have a species-change operation. If I become a monkey, at least I know I can always get a job…

  5. October 9, 2008 at 10:11 am —

    @Steve: HA! The last two sentences make that COTW-worthy.

    I’m sure we’ll have a monkey on a Frialator the moment Karl Pilkington is put in charge of the planet. God help us all.

  6. October 9, 2008 at 10:19 am —


    I can’t even imagine what the world would be like with Karl Pilkington in charge. But he’d probably come out about one monkey ahead of George W. Bush.

  7. October 9, 2008 at 10:38 am —

    Don’t low-tip the monkey!

  8. October 9, 2008 at 10:54 am —

    Thanks for the link to my shorts!

    I have to give a shout out to Colin who started the Axis Of Evo and the League of Evo Doers. :)

    As for the Christian Reality Dating Show, I suspect they wanted to find someone who would make all the contestants look good by comparison.

  9. October 9, 2008 at 10:57 am —

    Argh… I really hate these so-called “reality shows”. But maybe I just need to see something that appeals more to my interests… like say “Next Top Scientist” or “America’s Next Top NASA Administrator”. Each would need at least one “outrageous” candidate. Obviously, a Creationist would make waves in the Scientist show and The NASA Administrator program would demand at least one candidate who believes in UFOs and thinks NASA faked the moon landing. Comedy would thus ensue! And I would totally watch it.

    Anyway, choosing appointees in a reality show format would doubtless have better results than leaving it up to George W. Bush.

  10. October 9, 2008 at 11:07 am —

    @ImrryrNo: How about a reality show where monkeys/apes fill in for you at work while you take a vacation? “Chimp my Job” or something.

  11. October 9, 2008 at 11:09 am —

    @Steve: I wish I were a network executive, because if I were, you and I would be making BANK off of that idea. Oh-my-lack-of-a-god.

  12. October 9, 2008 at 11:12 am —

    Now if we could just figure out how to work explosions, viewer voting, half-naked supermodels and emotional meltdowns into the formula, we’d have the perfect reality show.

  13. October 9, 2008 at 11:16 am —

    A monkey filling in for Michael Bay? And viewers voting for who’s doing the best job.

  14. October 9, 2008 at 11:16 am —

    @MissMarnie: Welcome! Thank you for giving me the chance to confuse the hell out of my partner by exclaiming, “I could make evolutionary booty shorts!”

    @Steve: Chimp My Job! Hahahahaha
    With the economy the way it is, do you really think we need to remind more employers just how expendable their workforce is, though? ;)

  15. October 9, 2008 at 11:19 am —

    From the article: But the owner is hoping to bring up the next generation of monkey waiters, and is already training three baby monkeys to work as waiters.

    I was really hoping to read that the two original monkey waiters would train the others. Cause you know after that the owners would live like kings. Damn hell ass kings.

  16. October 9, 2008 at 11:55 am —

    x monkeys = 1 fundamentalist. Solve for x.

    Now people really can be replaced by trained monkeys.

  17. October 9, 2008 at 11:58 am —

    @Steve: “Chimp My Job?” Brilliant!

  18. October 9, 2008 at 11:58 am —

    You maniacs. You blew it up. You trained monkeys to wait tables. Damn you. Damn you all to hell.

  19. October 9, 2008 at 12:01 pm —

    Somebody inform despair.com. Picture of waiter monkey with caption. “You don’t like working here? Keep complaining.”

  20. October 9, 2008 at 12:37 pm —

    I don’t think monkeys would make viable kitchen staff, could you imagine the hairnets? (this comment was originally said to a friend telling me about his Wookie chef character in a Star Wars game)

  21. October 9, 2008 at 12:59 pm —

    @MissMarnie: I long for the day I see the Skepchick Flickr Pool updated with a pic of someone at a meet-up wearing those kick-ass short-shorts!

  22. October 9, 2008 at 1:25 pm —


    Chimp my job. That’s beautiful, man.


  23. October 9, 2008 at 1:40 pm —

    @Rebecca: Man alive, would I love to see that! I’m imagining them paired with gogo boots. ;)

    @Chew: I see a demotivator with the word, OUTSOURCING and below that, “There is always someone willing to do your job for less.”

  24. October 9, 2008 at 2:03 pm —

    ok- evo booty shorts- hottest thing ever. well, when they are pictured in my mind on a skepchick or otherwise woman who doesn’t believe in woo, anyway. monkey waiter- friggin’ sweet. frig, i mean, wow. that just rocks.

  25. October 9, 2008 at 2:06 pm —

    @MissMarnie: I’m picturing a certain Skepchick with certain rainbow snakeskin boots modeling some of your shorts.

  26. October 9, 2008 at 2:10 pm —

    @Amanda: I would be happy to loan the pair I made if the rainbow snakeskin boots owner were game.

  27. October 9, 2008 at 2:16 pm —

    Can I say that those shorts are really evolutionary because whoever wears them has an increased likelihood of reproducing? No? Ok, I’ll be a good guy and remain silent.

  28. October 9, 2008 at 2:36 pm —

    I had to look up the aforementioned rainbow snakeskin boots and I have to agree that the boots and shorts would make an interesting combination.

  29. October 9, 2008 at 6:28 pm —

    regarding the artifacts of Jay Walker’s library, I have to unleash the marxist in myself here:

    That kind of thing really aggrivates me. These are precious artifacts of science history and they are under the strict stewardship of a private collector. Sure it’s cool that he has an interest, but you know who else does? Way more people than him! Way more people that can’t see those amazing artifacts because it’s his private collection. That’s pretty damn sickening. To me’s little more than a tomb-raider: an eccentric thief compiling loads of artifact for his personal edification. “big affinity for the human imagination” indeed. Too bad he doesn’t have much of an affinity for his fellow humans. Sure he occasionally allows politicians, scholars and schoolchildren (awww) to see, but it’s still a private collection, in private hands, which leads me to my most important point:

    A great archeologist once said, “It belongs in a museum!” I don’t know who said that. Maybe it was me. But that might have been a mylanta commercial.

  30. October 10, 2008 at 7:53 am —

    @Some Canadian Skeptic:

    A great archeologist once said, “It belongs in a museum!” I don’t know who said that. Maybe it was me. But that might have been a mylanta commercial.

    It was Indiana Jones, in the third movie.

  31. October 10, 2008 at 1:15 pm —

    Never mind for the moment that Wired magazine and its sycophantic techno puppets and plasticine people would gleefully bid farewell to culture and most everything that has brought the human species to what good it currently has (but that’s an altogether different story isn’t it), but I must say that I, being a Canadian skeptic, am with the other Canadian skeptic in that, at the very, very least, this stuff belongs, that’s right, belongs in the public domain.

    A society and a world that enables any single individual to own so much stuff (whatever that stuff is, be it money, wealth, power, property, toys, whatever, does not matter), is just getting so tired, and so overdue for a regime change.

  32. October 10, 2008 at 1:35 pm —

    @Some Canadian Skeptic:

    It’s a trap. I’m not biting. You’ll need to try harder than that.

    Shane, don’t bite… it’s a trap.

    I am a Hedge

  33. October 10, 2008 at 8:06 pm —

    @Im a Hedge:

    I’m sometimes quite naive and a bit thick, so for a while I had no idea what you meant by “trap.” However, I clearly see now that it could be construed that my comment was a troll to lure, um, Libertarians — is that right? — into a debate.

    Well, I can assure you that was not my intent at all. Really, it wasn’t. I simply stated what I feel about any individual who amasses what I consider to be obscene amounts of wealth. That’s all.

    So, even if you or “Shane” (shanek?) did, er, “bite” I would not respond, or attack, or come out from under the bridge, or whatever it is you are concerned I was planning.

  34. October 10, 2008 at 9:01 pm —

    @Andrés Diplotti: “It was Indiana Jones, in the third movie

    I know. I was being incredibly funny. Can’t you tell? Incredibly funny.

  35. October 10, 2008 at 9:09 pm —

    @Im a Hedge: Absolutley not a trap. If I were trying to bait my libertarian friends I would have said “the government should legislate such so that certain artifacts, once being declared pieces of national culture, can never be allowed to be in the hands of a private collector” THAT would be baiting.

    No, I just think that its incredibly greedy for one underserving person to hoarde such amazing artifacts. Undeserving because his only supposed merit is success in a dot.com business. It’s not like any of the artifacts were his or anything. It’s just some greedy eccentric who wishes to portray himself as one who loves the “immagination” of humanity, then devotes no doubt millions of dollars for his particular habit. Other rich people hoarde art. This guy hoardes science/tech artifacts. Both gross me out. I have no patience for rich people who love nothing more than to show everyone how rich they are, especially when it comes at the cost of….

    anyway, I’m being redundant now. I said I wasn’t trying to bait, and I ended up saying loads that seem desigined to bait. I’ll bow out (for now).

  36. October 10, 2008 at 9:15 pm —

    @Some Canadian Skeptic:

    Much better efforts. Your initial attempts were far too weak. Now, you have taken my advice and tried harder. Still, your reasoned arguments and principled positions have no effect on me.

    Ha. Take that and wash it down with your precious Fosters Molson.

    I am a Hedge

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