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More Monkey News!

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Monkeys Gone WildFollowing quickly on the heels of yesterday’s entry concerning the science of booze, today we report on the comedy gold that is drunken monkeys.

It’s funny because on the most recently recorded episode of The Skeptics’ Guide to the Universe, Steve mentioned that there are very few things that rhesus macaques can’t do. They’ve been incredibly useful to scientists studying things like our blood types and why we prefer cloth mothers over wire mothers (aside: one of the funniest insults ever delivered to me was when I said something mean to a boyfriend and he bit back, “You picked the wire mother, didn’t you?). Now the cute little monkeys may be able to shed light on our drinking habits.

The study found that monkeys drank more when alone and when just finishing “work.” Also . . .

Lower-ranked monkeys and males tended to drink more overall, but certain individuals consistently drank more than others, regardless of status or housing conditions.

Three out of ten drunken monkeys attempted to use the telephone to call ex-lovers. One out of ten woke up with marker all over his face.

Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week. Try the steak tips.

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